I just felt so ashamed and blamed myself
"There is the horrible offence at the moment, and then the shame and blame that follow and feel almost worse than the original pain," Nikki was quoted by People. "When something like this happens to you, you understand the blame-the-victim mentality, how easy it is to feel shame rather than anger, how easy it is to feel like you could have stopped it yourself."
Nikki Bella, who is expecting her first child with her fiancé Artem Chigvintsev, admitted she spent several years blaming herself for the sexual assaults that changed her life.
"When that happened to me, I immediately just felt so ashamed and blamed myself, and that's what made me want to keep it such a secret. And keeping that a secret and blaming myself, I started to lose my confidence. I started to disrespect myself. And then the relationships I got into at a young age, I let other people disrespect me and felt like, that's okay, this is what I deserved."
Nikki Bella also opened up about the #MeToo movement that shook the entertainment industry. While talking about the movement, Nikki stated that she felt like if she is having these younger women look up to her then maybe she can help them as well. However, she got the support after she got into a relationship where her partner started to teach her how to respect herself.
"When I look back at just decisions I made based off of it, I wish I could have heard my words now as a 36-year-old woman then, and be like, 'You're going to be okay.'"