Ricky Gervais may be one of the most offensive comedians in Hollywood, but he is also the funniest. After all, the Hollywood Foreign Press Association would not ask the British comedian to host the Golden Globes for a fourth time if he was not capable of delivering the jokes and eliciting laughters.
He did have a high bar to surpass, considering the amazing hosting by Tina Fey and Amy Poehler in the last three Golden Globes. However, Gervais did not disappoint us as the host of the Golden Globes 2016. In fact he started out early, with a twitter burn to all of his audiences – presenters, nominees and winners alike. Here are all the nasty, friendly and brilliant jokes cracked by the comedian at the 73rd Golden Globe Awards:
Better get dressed and offend some humourless cunts I suppose. pic.twitter.com/X4idHHuMMf
— Ricky Gervais (@rickygervais) January 10, 2016
He then tweeted flipping off the media predicting they would say he offended people, because of course he did: "Can't wait for people to start reporting that I offended some people at The Golden Globes. Of course I f***ing did."
Merely a couple of minutes into the opening monologue, Gervais had a zinger for Sean Penn:
"You disgusting, pill-popping, sexual deviant scum. I'm going to do this monologue and then go into hiding. Not even Sean Penn will find me ... snitch."
Following this, he was zapping celebrities left and right. Here are some of the best jokes by Ricky Gervais from the Golden Globes in no particular order:
About Caitlyn Jenner: I'm going to be nice tonight. I've changed — not as much as Bruce Jenner. Obviously. Now Caitlyn Jenner, of course. What a year she's had! She became a role model for trans-people everywhere, showing great bravery in breaking down barriers and destroying stereotypes. She didn't do a lot for women drivers. But you can't have everything, can ya? Not at the same time.
While speaking about "Spotlight", Gervais was capable of throwing it on Roman Polanski, the film director who was arrested for sexual abuse on a minor: The excellent Spotlight has been nominated. Yeah. The Catholic Church are furious about the film as it exposes that 5 percent of all their priests have repeatedly molested children and been allowed to continue to work without punishment. Roman Polanski called it 'the best date movie ever.'
About equal pay and previous hosts Tina Fey and Amy Poehler: Of course women should be paid the same as men for doing the same job. And I'd like to say now, I'm being paid exactly the same as [what Tina Fey and Amy Poehler received] last year. No, I know there were two of them, but it's not my fault if they want to share the money, is it? That's their stupid fault. It's funny because it's true.
Gervais isn't even afraid of the offending the very people that hired him: Remember if you do win tonight, no one cares about that award as much as you do. Don't get emotional, it's embarrassing. That award is, no offense, worthless. It's a bit of metal some nice old confused journalists wanted to give you in person so they could meet you and have a selfie with you, okay? That's all it is!
Although he insulted the Golden Globes trophy, he sure does have a special place for it: "I won three Golden Globes myself ... one I keep by the bed to — it doesn't matter why, it's mine. I won it fair and square. It's just the right shape and size, it's nothing... yeah. To be clear: That was a joke about me shoving Golden Globes that I've won up my a**.
He also took a jab at Batman Ben Affleck while introducing presenter Matt Damon: He's the only person Ben Affleck hasn't been unfaithful to.
On Donald Trump's immigration plans: Two people who your future president, Donald Trump, can't wait to deport.
While introducing Amy Schumer and Jennifer Lawrence: No, not the names of Charlie Sheen's favorite hookers. The movies of these next two presenters.