In the wake of Burkini bans in several French towns, some pro-French Muslim individuals have urged the authorities to impose a ban on men wearing Speedos. They described it as "woefully-endowed white walruses terrorising our kids in public."
Dr. Yasmina Al-Hazeemi of France's 'Think of the Children! Foundation' urged parliamentarians to criminalise the scourge of tight fitting male swimsuits as she considers it to be a public safety crisis.
"These obscene bathers are in fact evil terrorists imperilling the mental health of millions. For the sake of our traumatised children and the very soul of our Republic, we must crush this shameless cult of sagging manboobs, shrivelled racoon balls and itsy-bitsy Sarkozian wee wees!" the Algerian-born paediatrician was quoted saying.
Her comments invoked a xenophobic response from the chairperson of the Front for the Supremacy of Stocky Indigenous Speedo Lovers as he was irked by what he claimed to be a 'slanderous attack on the honour of the Frenchman's glorious manhood.'
"From the beaches of Corsica to the shores of distant Thailand, it's our natural-born right to let it all hang it, no matter how many millions of juvenile nightmares it may cause," Jean-Paul Le Grosporc, FSSIS chair was quoted saying while adding that "unlike the dark savages flooding our continent, we natives are growers, not showers!"
The debate was picked up on Twitter, where many users weighed in on the "controversial" issue.
Burkini's don't bother me at the beach.— Duck Face (@londonlass666) August 27, 2016
It's the middle aged, hairy arsed, overweight men in skintight speedo's that offend my eye's!